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INSECURE WRITERS SUPPORT GROUP - day job

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Wednesday, March 7, 2012



For this months IWSG, I'd like to acknowledge those of us with day jobs and aspiring/or published writing careers.  No I'm not going to give a long list bloggers I know with day jobs - I'd probably leave a lot of people out by accident or ignorance - and I'm not diminishing the writing efforts of those who are able to make writing either their full time job, or fit it into a stay-at-home domestic arrangement.

Some lucky few are able to integrate their blogging needs with day jobs - and I gotta say I'm jealous of you SOBs.  But mostly, a day job (and I'm including those working on a college degree in this) and writing career doesn't mesh without loads of effort.  We sacrifice sleep, family time, social interraction, and sometimes financial gain (overtime, promotion, employment changes) for the writing obsession.

For me, this is the second time I've put my family through the insecure hardships of a dream.

I was about 32 when I rediscovered my social worker career goal.  I took a few general education classes, got discouraged, and married again for the third time in hopes of financial security.  (Yeah, I liked the guy too.)  After a while - and another baby - our marriage started to sour as the day care expenses (I had two young children from a previous marriage) of part time, minimum wage jobs for me exceeded our combined income and expenses, and I decided it was in our best interest for me to commit to a college degree.  Nah, the marriage didn't survive the change of focus from present needs to future goals.

My kids and I suffered a lot of deprivation and hardships while I obtained my social worker degrree; but the eventual employment paid off in triple the income.  We still struggle with the payments on the student loans, the cost of living in a single parent household; but our lives are better overall. I am earning as much in my five years of employment off my bachelors degree as my ex husband does from 18 years on his steady employment at the same company.   For me, the risk paid off.

Now I spend all my free time on the blogs, or at ftf writer's group, or working on the next writing poject.  As happened with the college interlude, dinner is usually a frozen find-it-eat-it affair; "homework" involves blog posts, writing/research sessions, researching/querying agents/publishers; beta reading and critiquing.  All these writerly activities I involve myself in are unpaid; yet they fulfill an aspect along my writing journey.

My kids (because I have no supportive spouse) just have to understand all my efforts at a writing career will eventually pay off for a future that may not involve them financially as they move out and attain livs of their own.  They saw my efforts pay off before with the college degree; they believe I'll make this endeavor a success.

I hope their faith is not misplaced.


While I toil away at  an unsure future in publication, I also strive at my day job to pay the bills.  I seek out overtime opportunities.  I go to work  on days I know most workers are calling in sick.  I take my responsibilities as a lead worker seriously.  I embrace my hard won career in social services (6 years in April).  I never forget I have bills to pay, mouths to feed, clients who depend on my presence in the office.

Some days though, all that stress just builds up and I just want to bury myself in someone else's success (ie, a published novel).
My thought is that all writers sacrifice for the dream.  That sacrifice is not always readily apparant to others in our lives as we squeee over notification our short story has been published in a free e-zine, our an agent/publisher has requested a partial or full submission of our manuscript.  But we, as authors, know what our end goal is, and what we have given up to achieve it.  We work towards balance.  We work towards personal goals.  We work for craft and potential readership.  We protect the present as best we can while striving for a day in the future when all our efforts bear fruition.

We do what we can.  We do what we must.  And we  have hope that the future will pay off if we are diligent in persuit of our long term goals.

I want to take this opportunity to applaude the working writer; be it a paying day job, a college degree, or freelance job working a deadline, we all have the same distractive issues to the completion of a writing project.

Last Friday my supervisor sat at my desk and asked what my weekend plans were.  We're a small unit, I'm his second in command, and we were killing ten minutes to quitting time.  I told him I had two book reviews with author interviews to send off in e-mail, a beta read that is requesting full critique, and I'd really like to make some progress on a couple novela's I've started writing on.  I also admitted I might just take the weekend off and read a book.

He knows me pretty well and asked if I was reading for pleasure or review.

I admitted I wouldn't read anything I didn't intend to review on my blog.

He asked if the beta reads and critiques were the same as the novel reviews.

I said no, a critique and a review were vastly different types of writing endeavors.  A critique is offered to assist a writer in the publication effort; a review showcases a novel's good points after publication.

He said it sounded like a lot of work.

I nodded my agreement.

33 comments:

Jai Joshi said...

Donna, so true!

Writing while coping with everything else, especially a day job, is very hard. Thanks for paying tribute to those efforts here and for sharing your own personal experience.

Jai

Anne Gallagher said...

I don't know how you do it, Donna. I don't know how any working writers do it. I do get to stay home, although when I was working, I did write as well. Weekends and odd hours. I managed a whole book once.

Michelle Gregory said...

i agree. good post.

Jamie Gibbs said...

I agree, and you make a good point. I wrote about something similar in my IWSG psot about living a double life. It's tough but it's worth it. Just think of yourself as a Blogging Batman.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Blogging Batman!
Donna, I don't know how some of you do it. (And sorry I'm one of those lucky SOBs with the job-blogging thing.) You should be proud of how far you've come. And know that your kids are watching you go for (and achieve) goals, so you are setting a great example for them.

Pat Hatt said...

Yes, I hate the friggin day job and would just like to write too. But we all have to pay the bills I guess and the cat would never forgive me if I didn't feed him..haha, just keep at it is all one can do.

Michael Di Gesu said...

Hi, Donna,

Thank you for sharing more of YOU today... I miss you too...

Now I am back to central Florida and plan NO road trips in the near future.... it's back to finishing up lose ends and sending BG out... You are the first on my list. Only a hundred pages to go...

I respect your choices and your determination. You truly are one in a million...

Cherie Reich said...

So true.

And I think it'll all be worth it in the end, even if it is a lot of work. :)

Grumpy Bulldog, March Madman said...

College make your life better? Rick Santorum would think you're such a snob. You shoulda stayed home barefoot and pregnant, daggumit.

Simon Kewin said...

Powerful post, Donna, and I can only express my admiration for you doing what you gotta do each time. Sometimes that isn't easy, I know, but it's your life and you have to live it your way.

Joshua said...

Sing it, lady. If I only had a TARDIS, I wouldn't be so stressed balancing work and blogging and writing.

DeniseCovey_L_Aussie said...

Hi Donna. Such a powerful post. How often do we stop to think about the 'sacrifices' we make as writers/authors? All the demands on our time. It is amazing that we manage to go out and put our hand to the plough, so to speak, but I feel my working life informs my writing life, so I'm pleased to have both (not to mention working for money pays for my travels, which ends up making me money as I write about them too.)

Thanks for all you do. I know some of it. You so often help me and I appreciate it more than you know.

You have chosen a difficult career but I'm sure there's a novel or two in it!

Denise

M Pax said...

That's a good song.

And, there just isn't enough time. I took a day off last weekend with a beer. It felt nice. I might take another this weekend.

DL Hammons said...

If it were easy...the government would be doing it! :) KUDO's to everything you do!!

Donna Hole said...

Thanks Jai.

Anne; I'm so very pleased with all you've accomplished in your writing career over the last year. keep up the good works.

Hi Michelle.

Jamie; a blogging Batman, I like it. I can't wait to read your post :)

Thanks Alex; I hope I am. And I'm glad some folks can self promote the way you do with blogging. I don't for a minute think that's easy either.

Haha Pat; I know what you mean about the cat. I've been looking at your published novels - they are on my TBR list.

Yay Michael; for a while there I though a gator ate you :)

Thanks Cheri. And thanks also for the Birthday Bash invite. I can't wait to read Defying Gravity.

Well Grumpy Dear, I had five babies, so I'm sure Rick would think me a proper little woman, even if I did deviate later in life (lol).

Thank you Simon. I know one day you will be a famous author too. I love your short stories.

Seriously Josh, I see where you're coming from too.

Denise; its so nice when work and writing compliment each other :) You are a treasured friend.

I'll toast you with a glass of wine Mary :)

LOL Don, you are so right.

.......dhole

farawayeyes said...

I applaud you my friend. Never stop striving.

Kelley said...

Yeah...I do the 9 to 5 job and then the writing job. The main issue is that no one sees my writing job as a 'real job' so when I want to spend a Friday night in front of my computer to write they don't understand.

But oh well! Maybe someday I won't need the 9 to 5 :) But till then, the blood, sweat, tears and lack of sleep are worth it.

Sarah Pearson said...

What a great post. One of the few upsides to being unemployed is that I have more time to write. I often feel guilty that I don't produce more when I see people balancing so many responsibilities and still getting it all done. I don't know how you manage, I guess it's a case of having to!

Will said...

Oh yeah, FT work and a toddler take it out of ya. It's a good week when I can sueeze in a couple hours of writing.

DEZMOND said...

what a nice story, Donnzie! I wish college degree and MA would bring money to people in my country as they do in yours :( Teachers in my country earn maybe about 6000 dollars a year :(

L.G.Smith said...

Tough going after a dream, especially when life demands so much. Gotta do it though. Imagine the great lesson you're teaching your kids by going after something you want enough to sacrifice for it, frozen meals aside. :)

Clarissa Draper said...

Wow, I will read this again when I think my writing life is difficult. You've been really focused on creating time for writing and I think it's wonderful. I hope your writing pays off just like your social work career. Sometimes I think that no spouse is easier than an un-supportive spouse though.

Julie Dao said...

Great post, Donna! It feels like such an accomplishment when we make time for what we love, even with all the busy stuff going on in all our lives! I guess that's how we know we really enjoy writing :)

Stephen Tremp said...

Wow! Best post of the IWSG yet. Sending big thoughts your way as you do what you think is right for you and those who depend on you. I'm really touched by this post.

Marta Szemik said...

I'm lucky enough to be able to work from home and have a supportive husband, but it does not get easy. Your post is truly inspiring. I don't know how you do it but you should be very proud of what you've accomplished. If you try and try again, it will in the end pay off:)

Jacqueline Howett said...

Great post. I agree with Jai.

Brinda said...

I believe that hard work pays off. I would be thoroughly depressed if I didn't think this. I applaud your determination to make a better life for you and your kids. I also can tell you are dedicated to the mission in your day job, so kudos to someone who actually cares. We need more of you.

PS. I am a Cage the Elephant fan. I have this album. :)

Lynda R Young said...

I admire anyone pursuing a full-time job and a writing career. I remember I used to snatch writing time on my lunch break in the middle of a busy food court. Not easy.

The Golden Eagle said...

Since I'm homeschooled and still in high school, I have plenty of time to write at home--I'm in awe of those who work and write and blog, not to mention spend time with their families and pursue other projects.

Michael Offutt, Tebow Cult Initiate said...

Your honesty is so refreshing. It is difficult to balance work with writing. It's also difficult when life throws you those curve balls that you have no choice but to take on the chin. In that case, writing (at least for me) is an escape from a miserable existence. I applaud you for being one of the most supportive and talented people I have ever met.

Eric W. Trant said...

You definitely need to have a good support network at home, to do this.

I'm lucky that my wife supports me, most days, and that my kids believe in what I'm doing. I also strive for balance, though. I try to balance my family against my dreams, rather than sacrifice one for the other.

You need both, I think, sort of like asking me to choose between air or water.


- Eric

Donna Hole said...

Thank you everyone for your support and kind words. I hope you are having a great weekend.

......dhole

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Hi Donna,

I'm sorry for being so delayed to pay a visit. My excuse is that the day-job and multiple writing projects seem to be going at it head-to-head lately. I've been grappling with these very issues. I appreciate your honest, supportive perspective.

We have much in common too. I'm a social worker in California's true North (Chico).

Keep faith.
xoRobyn